She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
