Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Randomize
