You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
