Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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