I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
My vagina is very pro this idea
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
