Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I'm way too hungover for life right now
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Randomize
