Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
