If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize
