Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking ros�, bitch!
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Randomize
