I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Randomize