My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
well I can't set my house on fire every night
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
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