i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
