we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
