So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize
