Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry swonkasaurous hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(734): View more from Michigan

You made me cry and you don't even care

Fav 24 1706 4455
share tweet
(610): View more from Pennsylvania

i'm in his phone as sushi coochie

Fav 30 1335 6993
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(240): View more from Maryland

He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?

Fav 48 4503 1761
share tweet
(661): View more from California

When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience

Fav 17 1085 5307
share tweet
(678): View more from Georgia

we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.

Fav 9 2879 1253
share tweet
(267): View more from Pennsylvania

This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.

Fav 6 2612 1043
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(972): View more from Texas

I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.

Fav 3 2312 918
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(519): View more from Ontario

Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.

Fav 1 261 268
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(406): View more from Montana

I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.

Fav 0 10 27
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT