"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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