it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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