i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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