yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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