her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
i just google imaged poop.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Randomize
