You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
Randomize
