Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Randomize
