It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Sober January is a disaster.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
