the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
