My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize