she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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