it wasn't lemon gatorade
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
