if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Randomize
