ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
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