Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
We left the knife in your bed.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
