I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
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