Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
