Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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