I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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