when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Randomize
