Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
