wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
