grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
