I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Randomize
