Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
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