Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
