Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
