I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
