covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
