"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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