Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
