windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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