yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
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