To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
