I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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